What’s the “Thing” Keeping You from What You Really Want?

What’s the “Thing” Keeping You from What You Really Want?
12 Oct 2015

What’s the “thing” that stops you from giving yourself permission to have what you want?

Last week while I was reflecting, I was thinking about how many of us have a “thing” that gets in the way of having the life we really desire and deserve. Is there something that you have been wanting to do, dreaming about doing, wishing that you’d already done and were enjoying it?

In today’s fast-paced world, we have so many responsibilities and tasks that we have to attend to. As women, the obligations we have with our children, husbands, and other family members are significant. And let’s not forget about our jobs and businesses that demand our time.

There never seems to be enough time in the day to get things done. Of course, we end up putting our own self-care last on the list. Although these are very valid reasons why many of us do not give ourselves permission to have the life we really want, I believe it is much deeper than life responsibilities. I actually think most of the time, it isn’t life getting in the way.

I can hear it now, someone is reading this and saying “Yeah right, you don’t know my life.” I don’t mean to appear insensitive or naïve to the concerns of life, but what I am saying is that, although these are real challenges to balance, they are more about convenient reasons than the main reason. These are  more so distractions that are in the way, but not  than they are the real “thing.”

Our survival instinct to stay in our comfort zone, is very sophisticated. It prevents us from recognizing what is really in the way of us having the health, joy, income, rest, connection, fulfillment, creativity, self-autonomy, etc. we want.

I’ve come to believe that our true self is asking for an opportunity to be fully expressed. It’s that subtle voice that is always whispering in your ear, “Hey, there is more for you.” But most times, we silence it because other things become more important. The distraction can last for hours, days, months and even years, while we go about our business on autopilot, all while a quiet voice asks for permission to fully express herself.

In order to overcome this “thing” which has become a roadblock, it is important to first identify what it is. Some would say they have been wanting healthy lifestyles, meaningful relationships, travel experiences, or perhaps a satisfying business for as long as they can remember, but they will not remove the “thing” that is in the way.The thing can be a poor habit, an addiction, a negative mindset, fear, or an excuse.

At the end of the day, it really is about giving yourself permission to overcome whatever the issue is and choosing to be great–because you’re worth it. The real issue is not knowing that you’re worth it. You deserve to live a joyful, fulfilled life. It’s just that simple. Once you begin to understand your value, you learn to let go of limiting beliefs–or “things”–which keep you from being the amazing person you were created to be.

What are you not giving yourself permission to have today because of your “thing”?


Renee Miller Clayton

Renee, MBA is the Managing Director and Executive Coach of Remember Who You Are Enterprises. She is a graduate of Accomplishing Coaching, an ICF certified leadership and ontological coaching training program. Renee has served as a Mentor Coach. She continues to work with the best and brightest in the professional and leadership development field. Additionally, she is an artist, national and international traveler, and music lover.

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